I have had this phobia for almost my entire life and it had caused me so much unnecessary pain and inconvenience I don't even know where to start!
Ophidiophobia: A particular type of specific phobia, the abnormal fear of snakes.
For convenience sake, we'll just refer it as an abnormal fear of S alright?
It's often very difficult to explain to people what is this "phobia" all about. People usually feel fear but when it comes to phobia, it's literally scared to death level! For me, the phobia came to me FOR ABSOLUTELY NO REASON! I have never encountered one in real life nor have my life endangered by one of it. I can only vaguely remember how I can never take the sight of it whenever it's on TV!
Believe me, it has given me ONE HELL OF A NIGHTMARE!
A lot of people thinks that the phobia is no big deal but for me, it's constantly a bother. To put it into perspective, I've decided to list down how it feels like living with Ophidiophobia.
[1] I get afraid of places that could possibly have S.. No matter how remote
I don't get this actually, Why is S an attraction to begin with?! Maybe because it's easier to bring it around wtf! So wherever I go to, I will automatically be on alert mode and hunt around for one. It's not that I wanna see one but I wanna make sure it's at least a globe away from me! Especially in amusement parks where I wanted to have fun not... crying like a mad woman wtf!
I have broke down in countless themed parks and tourist spots regardless who am I with. I cried in Genting Highlands with my high school friends; cried and run away in Langkawi's peak with my colleagues; froze and almost cried in Aquaria KLCC; and skipped the entire animal kingdom in Sunway Lagoon.
I am actually afraid to walk under trees too because one of my high school teacher was injured when a S fell from the tree and she tried to run away from it.. and fell.
Can you imagine how scary it is to know that the worst fear of your life is being displayed somewhere and when I see it, I'll run away, cry and lose all sanity for a moment? Can you imagine how is it like walking anywhere which could potentially have an S and just feel scared for no reason while putting on a straight face? It's such a terrible terrible feeling and I have to experience it ALL THE TIME!
[2] Movies are a gamble
Bad guy/witches/Satan/Egyptian/Voodoo lady etc. likes S a lot a lot a lot!
WHY CAN'T THEY USE BUNNIES INSTEAD?!
Why can't Voldemort put part of his soul in a bunny rabbit? You know.. hop hop hop! So badass right?
S is badass I get that but it's SO OVERUSED IN SO MANY MOVIES! Why can't they use like bats or ducks or something. I must be the only person alive who've cried in the cinema watching Harry Potter thanks to Nagini i.e. Voldemort's pet S.
Even before my bf was my bf, our friends set us up to sit alone in the movie and so ngam there's a lot of S in that show (Prince of Persia I think) and yeap.. I broke down. I was so embarrassed at that moment because I didn't tell him I was dead afraid of S. But he took the opportunity anyway so lucky him! haha
[3] Animal skin products
Not talking about real ones but just the replica.
Nope can't take it. Even if it's not S skin but I will just feel scared of it. Just the scaly type not like cow leather. And whenever someone wears the pattern and come close to me, I'll feel like passing out! Haha. No joke! Of course I'll have my ways to avoid direct contact. I'll just look up, down, left, right, underground, beyond the clouds or at my own boobs la wtf! But since I can't control what other people like to wear so I constantly have to deal with that and some people are IMPOSSIBLY DIFFICULT TO DEAL WITH WHICH BRINGS ME TO...
[4] Annoying human
There's so many annoying people around me sometimes..
Like usually, I'll tell people of my phobia hoping they'll understand my situation and don't agitate the deadly fear of mine.
"I can't take S. TV, pictures or even cartoons also I can't take it"
And the challenge automatically starts!
People will start stuffing whatever that's made of S skin and make me touch it or make hissing sound and tickle my legs just to see my reaction. WHICH PART OF PHOBIA DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? It'll usually stops when they saw my reaction and know I wasn't bullshitting. Of course, a lot of people are nice and will try to avoid scaring me.
Both my sisters are annoying in this sense too. The IKEA soft toy S which scares the shit outta me.. yea they HAVE to point out where is it or take one and chase me around IKEA! A very good example of how it may be amusing to everyone else but to me... All of me was in panic mode. My cells were trying to leave my body at the same time wtf!
[5] Being overly afraid in general
I can't even spell the word in full without feeling scared! It's unreasonable isn't it.
Sometimes, I imagine about S and feel fear for my bolster.
Whenever I saw its image in social media, my breathing stopped on its own. I had to scroll away and hide the post or get my sister to do it for me lol.
It's really pathetic when something so common and intriguing to many turns out to me my worst nightmare. It's so common in the sense that it's abundant and used as a form of "entertainment". Some even consider S as pets.
The thing is, it's never a choice for me. I choose to not be afraid of it but I still can't control myself! I shiver, I cry and my mind can goes blank for hours after being traumatized. Sometimes, I don't or rather I couldn't think straight for hours after seeing one. Completely blank. It's tough living with Ophidiophobia but alright I seem to be still alive but when that moment hits you then buh bye sanity lol
Tried to overcome it for ages but I haven't find any suitable or proper remedies. If anything, the fear level seems to have escalated. Seeking professional help is definitely a rich man's benefits if you ask me. Tried looking at images or watch Jungle Books wtf but I can't really take both. Okay Kung Fu Panda isn't THAT bad cause it's quite tiny lol. The 9gag post with a hat on the S is NOT CUTE AND NOT HELPFUL IT'S SCARYYYY!
I don't know why am I posting this up actually. My palms are now sweaty and my spine is feeling the chills cause my bad memories from S are getting brought up as I am writing this blog post. It's like I'm torturing myself wtf! But I guess I really wanted to share how living with a phobia is like... It's unreasonable but it's real.
So next time when someone says that they're afraid of heights, don't force them to look down cause believe me.. When phobia hits, you really feel like you're dying inside.
Okay I guess that's all for my blog post today! Hopefully can find some Ophidiophobia healing group lol
Signing off now! Happiest day of the week tomorrow.. Here's a picture of a cute Pusheen plushie for no reason at all.. hehe
