Hello hello!
I am amazed at my own reasoning now. Why? Because I am angry at procrastinating so I want to blog about it but blogging is essentially procrastinating right? It's like I have to write a 3k words report but I ended up typing out why or how I am procrastinating faster than typing out my report. There is a difference in incentive clearly because I love to blog but it so dreadful for me to write a report. I don't hate assignments, in fact I enjoy how I manage to stick pieces of information together and make a very cohesive and meaningful piece of work. It's also like building in the knowledge into my brain without trying (hehe)!
So that aside, I actually just finished my 3k assignment with a lot of editing needed to be done. I also have to cut my word count! Since I am prone to redundancy (according to Mr. Editor), I guess cutting words will not be a hard task right?
The moment I finished my assignment (even though it is still a draft), my head starts to have ideas of going out with friends for dinner. Have a good laugh or just to reward myself with some good food. But the thing is, most people I ask will reject me because they either have not finished their assignments or they are so tired and they just want to rest first.
And then I think to myself..
"I am tired too.. But why do I have such urge to go out instead of resting?"
Today is extra tiring too because I only had 4 hours of sleep. I always thought I just really enjoy going out and have a good dinner and relax myself. It is a very legit reason right to want to get some R&R? But apparently that is not my sole reason.
I tried to imagine what happens if I just go home straight from uni. I will shower, watch TV, eat and.. what else? It means that I can actually free up some time if I actually do go home. The thing is whenever I go home, I'll see the pile of work I have on my study table and stress myself out. Like I have to rush to finish it! I will feel guilty if I have extra free time and I have to waste it by not doing anything productive. There are occasions where I overworked myself and my mom tells me to not study and go to sleep (yes my mom is awesome like that! she thinks I over-study). What did I end up doing?
FORCE MYSELF TO REST!
Yeap force will be the right word! I understand human generally need to rest so we can be more productive the next day but I am just so reluctant to rest when I have 27236824793 things to do! So I have to conceal, don't feel and let it go. That's how I can get some rest. By FORCING myself.
It is actually not THAT bad! It is like some movie plot with an angel and a demon popping out on my shoulder and telling me different things. One says "Go Work" and the other says "Go Rest". I honestly don't know which is the angel and which is the demon since sometimes resting does help but sometimes I just get more anxious the other day.
So I guess that is why I prefer to stay out after a long long day. Just to take my mind off things.
Out of sight, out of mind
That is very true for me.
Actually I think the fact that today is Friday also contributed to my urge to go out! I usually don't have Friday classes and I am giving myself a reward just for showing up for a replacement class today.
Now for the hard part! Looking for kaki (gang/partner) to go out with me. If I can't find then... Okay fine I'll do more assignments then (makes a grumpy face)
Guess that's all for my post with not much purpose! I shall end it with a OOTD which I slap on because I was too tired and wasn't thinking straight in the morning! Hopefully I will find time to explain this OOTD in a very near future post! Look forward to that!
Until the next time folks!
Bye~
